Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Chuck's Redneck Getaway with Camevil

*Guest post by Camevil*

Chuck arrived at my office just in time to join me for the big weekend event 'o the summer: Dragwway 42's Rock n Race held in West Salem, Ohio. To prepare Chuck for a weekend of cars, beer, fried food on a stick and redneck depravity, I sat him down at my desk and advised him on the State's age of consent, fireworks, firearms, DUI and sodomy laws:

We then packed up and set up camp at the raceway's grounds. Here's Chuck marking his territory at the campsite, as kindly suggested by the the dogs:

Chuck then chillaxes before one of the drag races, with a stolen bottle of Camevil's prized Strongbow:

Chuck and Goji meet for the first time. It was anti-climactic, as Goji was more interested in the tater chips:

Fast Eddie tries to hump Chuck, who is apparently a bottom:

Chuck, perhaps imbibing in too much liquid joy, attempts to steal this Mustang and enter the next race. Of course, being unable to reach the gas pedal proved his undoing:

He did, however, re-enact his favorite scene from Death Proof:

Unfortunately for Chuck, "choking the chicken" is a joke that fails to age amongst rednecks, as these people demonstrate with disturbing gusto:

Chuck rocks out to the smooth tunes of Bobzilla's band, Horror of '59:

His zealous attraction to Bobzilla was embarrassing, actually, as he attempts to "cock" block the other fans from rushing the stage:

But Chuck's antics are rewarded with a little tongue action by Bobzilla:

Later that evening, while I went to relieve myself, Chuck turns up missing. Oh noes!:

Where, oh where, could he be?

BUSTED! The cock-snatcher is caught:

Chuck is safely in my custody once again. Rejoice.

Diva and I get cozy with Chuck. "The first taste is free, ladies."

As the festivities went on, someone thought it a good idea to turn Chuck into a party favor. This random redneck demonstrates the practicality of having a rubber chicken beer dispenser:

And of course, everyone else wanted in on the action:

(say, I think that guy was cheating!)

...well, except the more sober ones:

Diva and I show Chuck a good time by making a boobie sammich:

And he was passed around to various campsites that evening until the late hours of the morning.

Before sending him on the way to the next host, I attempted to wash away his sins. Somehow, though, I don't think he'll ever be clean.

Chuck saga to be continued from somewhere in the U.K., I believe....


  1. It looks like you all had a blast!! I love West Salem!

  2. chuck is a dirty dirty boy! lol but I love him! xoxo

  3. Great post, and plus two points for the "Cock block" reference!

  4. OMG...I nearly spit water out my nose @ "cock-blocked" the stage!!
    Leave it to Chuck, good times, good times!!!

  5. lol. love it. hes such a fun loving thing.

  6. Chuck, Chuck Chuck are a dirty, dirty bird!

    And did is that one redneck (who is choking the chicken) missing a tooth? Love it!

  7. Sure chuck isn't in WV somewhere? I swear that's a typical Saturday night around these parts

  8. That was awesome. That chicken is gonna be smelly, though!

  9. Love chuck's adventures!!
    Good job Camevil :)

  10. i love the bubble bath shot the pretty woman! lol.

  11. What's the deal, where the eff is Chuck?